Chapter 7

“How would you feel about a visitor? Not really a roomie, but just an extended visitor?” I asked through the door, trickles of hope laced in my words.

“Dude, how about not.”

“Come on, dude. It’s for a cause!”

“No.”

“Please? You know that time in band camp where I sprung you outta the arms of that woman who wasn’t surely a woman and I had your back! Come on!” I was whining.

“Stalking some chick you just met is not the same thing,” Jeremy said, a bit too amused at my misfortune as he opened the door a smidge.

I had spent a few days mulling the previous disaster over; the beach kiss, the confession of feelings, and finally, my rejection of Aldo…Ally…Willow? I didn’t even know her name. But she was wrung up in my chest, coiled inside my thoughts and wouldn’t leave me alone.  So I devised a plan. “Come on, it’ll just be for a few days, and it’ll be over in no time.”

A long sigh. He widened the gap of the door. “You owe me big time and if you get me caught, you’re dead.”

The cafeteria, or in other words, the jungle. I approached and entered like I belonged there. Nonchalantly, I approached her. Or who I thought was her but was really her evil twin who kindly directed me to where I could take my creepy self. But on my dismal leave, I noticed her…the real her, sitting alone at a table, poking at some cafeteria food. I walked with tentative footing as I greeted her.

“Hey, so. How ya doing?”

She looked up, surprised, “Why are you here?”

“You. Why else?”

“Well, call me crazy but when you rejected me at the beach the other day, I figured I wouldn't be hearing from you.” She pulled away from the table, preparing to leave.

I reached for her arm, stopping her. “Just give me a chance.”

She ripped away from me, retorting, “I gave you a chance, I threw my chances at you but you just dropped them and let me walk away.”

“I hardly just let you walk away, okay? Give me a break. I don't know you that well. You don't understand.”

“You're right, you don't,” she huffed.

“That's why you should give it chance. Get to know me. Let me get to know you.”

“I don't need people knowing me; I came here and got a private dorm for specifically that reason alone.”

“What changed? I'm still the same guy you threw yourself at two days ago. Go ahead and blame me for not playing you. I don't care. I just thought I'd give it a try because you seem like a decent girl and I'd like to get to know you. But pass me by, it wouldn't be the first time a gorgeous girl like you didn't see me worth anything.”

I turned to leave, but not before being collided with her next statement. “Ha, gorgeous girl? It was you who reminded me that I'm far from that. I swore that when I fucking came here I wouldn't get distracted from my studies. I met you and forgot, you shot me down and I remembered my intentions.”

“How did I remind you of anything? We barely talked. Excuse me for trying. Bye.”

“You just don't realize it do you, you don't see how alike we are? You can't see past your own ego to think that maybe for one second I can't let myself be vulnerable; do you not know what insecurity feels like? Sorry if I misinterpreted your actions that day, being all nice and funny and flirting for you being interested. So fine, Gene, walk off and forget me.”

It was she who walked away and left me standing there, a bit in awe, but mostly taken aback. What was this intense ache? It was wrong to feel euphoric after a heated argument, but what’s worse was that I wanted more. I found myself following her, with biting words licking at my lips. She exited the building but not long after I was trailing her. I closed down on her, grabbing her arm as she entered the dorms. Inside the hallway, I pressed her against the wall, and stared at her through clouded eyes. Her syrupy eyes were aflame against the irises, sending me shells of hatred. I leaned in and kissed her. Something of a hard, hateful kiss, fueled by uncertainty and anger. I whispered against her lips, “I like you too.”

“Then, why, Gene. Why couldn't you just say that at the beach, hm? Or do you just like the fight?”

“I'm...pretty fucked up, I guess,” I replied sheepishly.

“No I'm the fucked up one, actually considering giving you a second chance,” she paused, “I have a feeling this won't end well.”

“Probably won't.” I grinned. “But it's worth a try.”

“Fine. But answer one thing.”

“What might that be?”

“You don’t actually go to this college.”

Pause. Debate. Reiterate. Deliberate. “I do.”

Silence. “I’m here right now.”

“Oh really? Because there’s no way that you're not on the dorm listings, and you're definitely not on the student roster, I work for the Student directors as a secretary I have access to all student files and you're not in there,” she waited, then continued, “I’m not mad, Gene, I just want a clean slate.”

“…Okay, so technically I’m not enrolled.”

“Didn't think so, anything else you want to admit before we get this started?”

“Nope I think that’s it,” I said confidently.

“Alright, if you're unsure speak now, or if you break your peace I will be royally pissed off. Fair warning.”

I smiled, nodding, wondering how deep I’d gotten myself into the earth. Surely, I’d reach hell soon enough.

Chapter 8